The Myth of the “Professional You”
If you’ve watched Severance on Apple TV, you know the premise: your work self and your personal self are completely severed from each other. Different memories, different identities, no connection between the two.
Here’s the uncomfortable part: most city executives are already living a version of this.
We’re told early in our careers to “be professional.” For many leaders, that translated into creating a sharp divide. There’s the version of you who shows up in council chambers and crisis press conferences. And then there’s the version who goes home to your family, your actual thoughts, your real feelings.
The problem? That split is costing you more than you realize.
Over time, compartmentalization doesn’t protect you. It erodes your clarity, drains your energy, and turns leadership into survival mode instead of actual leadership.
Why Compartmentalization Fails Leaders
On the surface, separating your professional identity feels like protection. If the council criticizes your decision, it’s easier to take when you tell yourself they’re criticizing the role, not you personally.
But you’re not a robot. Every budget cut lands somewhere. Every staff conflict registers. Every midnight emergency meeting takes a toll. Pretending the job doesn’t affect you just buries the impact until it shows up as exhaustion, disconnection, or full burnout.
The hidden costs include:
- Decision fatigue gets worse. When your inner compass isn’t guiding you, every choice feels heavier.
- Confidence disappears. If the real you and professional you don’t align, second-guessing becomes your default mode.
- Relationships suffer. Your family feels the residue of unprocessed stress. Your staff senses when you’re not grounded.
What started as a coping mechanism becomes a leadership problem.
Integration as a Leadership Advantage
The most effective city executives aren’t the ones who can wall off their emotions. They’re the ones who integrate who they are with how they lead.
When you stop splitting yourself, you gain access to clarity and energy that were trapped in the “off-limits” parts of your identity. Instead of carrying the weight of two selves, you stand anchored in one whole self. You’re steadier in council chambers and at your own dinner table.
Integration looks like:
- Reconnecting with what matters. Knowing your values so decisions flow from clarity instead of reactivity.
- Owning your identity. Letting the qualities that make you human (compassion, courage, boundaries) inform how you lead.
- Sustaining your energy. Building systems that protect you long-term instead of surviving on adrenaline.
The City Pays the Price Too
Compartmentalization doesn’t just drain you. It impacts your community. When executives operate from disconnection, the ripple effects touch staff morale, council trust, and public outcomes. Reactive leadership shows up in short-term fixes, misaligned priorities, and missed opportunities for genuine progress.
Integrated leaders bring consistency. Their teams know what they stand for. Their councils experience clarity in communication. Their communities see decisions grounded in integrity instead of performance.
When leaders reclaim their wholeness, entire cities benefit.
Moving Beyond the Severance Trap
If you’ve been living as two different versions of yourself, you’re not failing. Nearly every city executive reaches a point where the mask feels too heavy. The shift begins with acknowledging the toll and giving yourself permission to integrate.
Ask yourself: Where am I splitting who I am from how I lead? What would change if I brought my whole self into this role?
You don’t have to keep pretending the weight isn’t heavy. Leadership doesn’t demand a split identity. It demands the opposite: a grounded, integrated self who can sustain the role without losing the person behind the title.
Final Thoughts
Severance makes for compelling drama, but in real life, separating your work self from your real self is a recipe for burnout. City leadership should feel worth it, not like you’re two completely separate beings.
The leaders who thrive long-term choose integration. Clear on who they are, anchored in their values, willing to lead as whole people.
When you stop splitting yourself, you don’t just reclaim your energy. You reclaim your leadership. And your city feels the difference.
